 - won’t chew on your shoes
 - is fully housebroken
 - just wants to play with you
 - doesn’t hump your leg
 - also accepts cat pictures
 - loves you unconditionally
 - you don’t have to keep on a leash
 - won’t pee on your rug
 - loves to play fetch
 - doesn’t bite (hard)
 - won’t bark at the mailman
 - is great with the kids
 - can digest anything, even chocolate cake
 - is always happy to see you
 - isn’t afraid of fireworks
 - is allowed everywhere
